I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else
There were some things I noticed today about stuff I do and i thought I'd pose the question to other people. Is it just me or does anyone else do things that really make them mad but keep doing them over and over, making yourself madder and madder?? For instance, I frequently walk up steep stairs (and thats an effort in itself believe me) with a cup of scalding tea and try and drink it mid route. Everytime I spill profusely, burn my massive gob and stain my good tee shirts but still i keep on doing it. At this rate I will be walkin around in bibs with no roof on my mouth.
I also have an issue with people eating and the way the do it so vilely. But yet, depsite the rage I feel when I see someone eating with their mouth fully open or hear every last slurp, I still continue to watch them carry out this gruesome task they call eating. Mostly I do it for the purpose of giving them dirty looks but they mock my evil glares and continue to eat like animals. I want to physically remove the food from their fat gobs with a sledge hammer and of course, this innner turmoil could be completely remedied if i JUST STOPPED LOOKING AT THEM. But stare and go mental I do till my face boils and shakes, not a pretty sight.
Also, every month I buy a certain lesbian magazine which is shit every month but I still buy it in the hope it will get better even knowing that everytime I will be sourly disappointed. And I cry and I moan to the point of breakdown about it but still I find myself strutting into the newsagent around the 20th of each month to purchase it. Why do I do these things that torment me so?? Am I trying to drive myself even closer to insanity? I'm pretty sure it's working. I seem to find everything that annoys me and go at these things full force, tipping my little mind closer to the edge. Am now going to put the wrong stamps on hundreds of envelopes so I then have to do them all over again. Why?!
Fingerless sparkley gloves
Dark Hair and Blue Eyes combined
Fitted Shirts and ties on ladies
Blue's song... 'if you come back'... or something, cheesey but needed
Full Fat Mayo, like eatin lard
Publics singing outbursts (in shops etc)
So Solid Crew
2/26/2002 02:06:00 PM
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