I have an apology to make. It would appear that I have managed to offend a vast number of people, all of whom have taken my weblog way too seriously. These enraged lesbians who got my weblog address off a queer message board have all gone mad. All their comments were of a similar content, ‘God she is so up herself’ when actually they mean "God I so wanna be up her’. I have learned the language of lesbos well. Anyway, if I can squeeze my ego down just a tad and stiffle my laughter so I can type properly again I would like to thank these lesbians for their criticisms and for giving me and my mates the best laugh we’ve had all week. This is a weblog, MY own personal opinion on various things, be that lesbians, being a chubber or thinking I am gorgeous. If people have bugger all else to do than to take the shite (because that’s all it is, it aint written law you know) that I write seriously or personally then it aint me with the problem. The laughs were mainly induced by lesbians thinking I am vain. Saying that I find myself attractive in TWO places in the whole of the goddamn universe does not qualify me as egotistical and up my own arse. And anyway, so what if I look in the mirror and occasionally think I look OK. That’s called respecting yourself, not being pompous. And I didn’t say that other people (barr my mates in Finsbury Park) find me attractive cos generally they don’t so where’s the vain in that? And the part where one lezzer said I clearly have an ambition to be a man… Yeah, that’s why I am the one in overalls with a shaven head trying to fuck everything, yeah that’s so true. Mind you I did help a lady with her buggy containing an oddly heavy baby up numerous stairs the other day, therefore I am a gentleman. Well done, gold stars all round for that eagle eyed dyke. I take the piss out of myself more than I do anyone else and in reality I am not exactly alike to my writing persona so I wont get to bothered about what lesbians with a passion for all things fanny think. I realise I have a problem with some lesbians (as much as I have a problem with some straight men and straight women) and being that many of my friends reading this weblog are lesbians who share the same opinion then I guess there are a lot of us ‘freaks’ out there. Justification of my comments over. I am not going to turn this into a slanging match between myself and lesbos that I don’t know nor will I bother to read their comments on their message board. Oh and because I have a tracker on my site I can see them all cheking my site furiously to see if I have made mention of them. Well here you go and if you are so infuriated by it, stop bloody reading it, you are only uping my number of visitors so you are only doing me a favour. But my sincere apologies to those who have been offended by my comments which were meant as a bit of fun, not to be taken seriously.
Anyway, back to more important things. My birthday went without event or anything else for that matter. My work did bring in cake and wine and once again after 3 whole glasses I was fit only for bed (my own alone of course). I was very touched (by my own hands) and I woud also have been touched by my flatmates' (oh please)gesture of buying me a cake had they have gotten off their arses and actually given it to me instead of telling me, ‘there’s a cake for you in the kitchen’. Not even a candle in sight. Can you tell we’ve been living with each other slightly too long? There’s definitely a distinct division. Myself and Straight Man A in one corner and the poof and straight bird in the pink one. I wouldn’t quite say the gloves are off on our part but you do get the impression that as soon as you even get off your chair that the other two become embroiled in a bitchin’ session. We even have 2 cabs to escort us to the airport and while this is due to a lack of room to get us AND our luggage in one, it signifies everything.
Oh and the American chick called me sweet today. Think I have scored.
My Barbie watch
Pan au chocolat
Lesbians not taking things so seriously
My friends (there are a couple you know)
Missin at Home with the Braithwaites
No milk, mouldy milk is better than no milk
Been told to clean windows before leaving the flat
Myself for being so mean…
Severely chipped nail varnish