Diary of a Glitter Splashed Britney Lovin' Lesbo

I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else

Name:Miss Fee


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Currently Reading:

The Outsider - A Camus

Choke - C Palahnuik


Friday, April 26

The conversation about forward rolls was brought up again yesterday. I really would like them to be a part of every day society. I would love people to feel free and uninhibited about their kid gymnastics and be able to pull them off whenever they feel like it, be that in the pub or in the workplace. If everyone works together on this it will become a new pub rule and the quality of your forward rolls will allow you special privaliges, such as money off beer or a snog from hot bar staff. No doubt each bar will arrange their own special prizes in honour of the forward roll which is grossly underrated and not always easy to perform. I think the next time I visit the Muff Club I will carry out a succession of forward rolls to make my way to the bar. It can only be good and make me utterly filthy and real special. I only hope I learn to do them in a straight line as crashing into stinky feet and fat ankles would cause great pain and humiliation. I was discussing this real life issue (isn't it a worry that this is all I have to discuss?) with my office work collegues only yesterday. It was this conversation that spurred all 3 of us on, so that's myself a not so nimble 23 year old and 2 mid thirties mothers, to do forward rolls in a limited office space. One mother was apprehensive about partaking in this soon to be customary activity as she was scared that the sudden bending over movements may cause a massive fart to dislodge itself. She got over this fear and joined with the best of us. One mother got so carried away and delighted with her kidness that she tried to pull of a non free-standing handstand and kicked her leggings clad legs against the wall at such a force that she took half the wall paper down and left a heel mark in the wall. I think it was this, nevermind the great hilarity and rolling thumping noises, that caused the boss to investigate. In he walks as the handstand mother is falling straight over backwards, her face all rosy and her shirt way up over her neck while me and mother number two are face out on the floor, she with her Laura Ashley skirt around her waist and me with my jeans somewhere around my knees after the belt popped. The fun was over and I was termed a bad influence and ordered to do actual work, to grow up and get a new belt. It was fun though. I think everyone should regress back to their childhood for the sake of much laughter and stupidity. Is the best laugh I've had in ages adn I know the usually reserved mothers are thankful for the joy and more laughter lines I brought to their lives, if only for 15 minutes, even though they now owe the boss new wallpaper and have the embarrassment of knowing the boss saw their mammoth non sexual knickers.