Diary of a Glitter Splashed Britney Lovin' Lesbo

I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else

Name:Miss Fee


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Currently Reading:

The Outsider - A Camus

Choke - C Palahnuik


Wednesday, June 26

I thought my quest to find the world's biggest fanny had come to an end yesterday. I thought my desperate plea to Mr Graham Norton to help me seek out massive minge had all been in vain. Imagine the horror when I realised that the contender who was so damn close to extra large was looking back at me from the mirror. The effect had been created by hoisting up my low slung jeans so they rested somewhere around my collar bone, thus giving the impression of a really massive fanny which was the size of my house and the neighbours hedging. Clearly it was simply an illusion and therefore a non qualifier for biggest fanny in the world. The original biggest fanny in the world was no trick of bad jeans but was a real life jumbo puss in full flesh. To prove its very largeness it was photographed up next to a football and this fanny was apparently as good as eating the ball it was that ginormous. Oh and I aint talking about the looseness of minge, I'm talking the size of the outer casing, that's far more entertaining than a porn stars fanny that's been fucked more times than I've overeaten. And so, after relief that my fanny encased in hipsters is not the biggest beaver in history I go to continue my quest and if anyone comes across the winner before I do, please please send me photographic evidence. Oh and I don't consider this hobby a perversion, more like I have a curiosity that needs satisfied. Ahem.