Diary of a Glitter Splashed Britney Lovin' Lesbo

I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else

Name:Miss Fee


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Currently Reading:

The Outsider - A Camus

Choke - C Palahnuik


Monday, August 5

As I was packing up my paddling pool which had been festering in my garden, making my grass turn brown and housing too many indescribable beasts since my 'kids' party all those weeks ago, something was brought to my attention. As I shook out the hedgehogs and slugs and doggy poop and encrusted jelly I noticed a warning on the side of the blow up pool. It said "CAUTION: THIS PADDLING POOL IS NOT TO BE USED AS A LIFE SAVING DEVICE". Jesus and here was me thinking that if I were to choke on a piece of pie and gerkin that I would be able to run out, blow up the pool with my handy foot pump and instruct it to perform the hiemlichen (sp???!) manouvere and all would be good, I would be saved from choking to death. Similarly, I felt safe knowing that were I to get run over by that number 23 bus as I ran across the road to get home for food then I would be ok because I had a paddling pool waiting to save my life at home. I may never leave the house again with this new knowledge that a giant rubber pool will not and can not bring me back to life should something happen to me and I'm in a position where I am no longer breathing. Gutted.

Britney's song BOYS charted in the UK charts somewhere around position 7. I held back a sniffle when I heard the news and wondered why even though it's not that great a song with the remix why the video didn't help sales and push it up to top 5. She's a sexy lady and i need a britney fix so will go find a hot ass picture of my lady to reclaim my sanity after the depression i have fallen into because a paddling pool will not save my life, even if it were the cause of my untimely demise. How rude.