Diary of a Glitter Splashed Britney Lovin' Lesbo

I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else

Name:Miss Fee


My 100 Things

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Currently Reading:

The Outsider - A Camus

Choke - C Palahnuik


Friday, August 9

I have been transformed! No longer will I sit with my legs wider than the north sea and never again will I hold my fag in that manly way and certainly I will not fart in public anymore. The checked shirts and the men's jeans have been thrown aside in favour of tassled belts, touseled hair and plunging necklines. Yes it's true, I Miss Fee, girl tomboy extraordinarre is now an honourary girl with hope this will led to being an out and out real life girl who looks in every mirror and moans about a curl gone wrong or a smudge of mascara. I am part of thr femme crew and am now qualified to talk clutcheys, pointy shoes and hair product with the best of them. This dramatic transformation occured last night when I found myself questioning the authenticty of a designer handbag and when I found myself agreeing that delicate scarves around the neck were sometimes fashionable depending on the wearer. No one could believe it when I leaned my freshly shaven face across the table to enquire as to whether or not tapered denim jackets with shoulder detail were in or not. Not because they were astounded by my lack of fashion knowledge because that's to be expected but more so because I was even taking an interest in the wonders of Top Shop as opposed to Top Man. I was in disbelief myself and even swapped my butch Marlboro Reds for the more feminine, dare I say trendy, Marlboro Lights. I know this is all exceedingly hard to take in because I know I suit a frock as well as I suit dating men but you'd be surprised with the results of Miss Fee in a dirty denim skirt teamed with a gypsy frill. Oh that killed it. For anyone that knows even the slightest thing about me, apart from my odd obsession with puss size cos that's the most blatant thing ever, then you will know I made this entire rant up because I fully despise a gypsy frill. I don't get the 'gypsy chic' thing and I never will. Who needs a bit of ruffle that stretches all the way up to your cheek bones and who even wants droopy sleeves that bunch and catch on drinks at the table? They are just plain stupid. Stupider even than me turning into Miss Femme 2002. At least that thought is only semi laughable and maybe even passable whereas gypsy frills are ridiculous and uncalled for and who cares how daring your neck line is, if it's encased in a gypsy frill then it's just all wrong. I don't care that I follow trends as well as I kiss men, I don't think I need to be qualified in all manners of fashion to make comment on all the idiotic ones that smack me in the face like a wet fish. I just don't agree with gypyt frills cause who ever had a nice thing to say about them gypsies that camped and pooped in their back garden? I'm sure the last thing you were thinking as they drove away in their caravans leaving a trail of poop and pish was 'oh gee I wonder where she got that stunning blouse with homemade frill, I really must catch her up and get one stinkin' of jobbies too.' Rarrr, oh yes the PMT is out in force, and I really am looking forward to my nasty fashion party tomorrow cause at least i wont be faced with every second slag in a bloody gypsy frill. Give me a shellsuit and heels and a pair of leggings and sandals anyday. Off I go to re assess my wardrobe and to remove all items of manly dress. Yeah, like I have that much time.

Wondering: how many times I can say 'gypsy frills' in one weblog entry
Concerned about: the sudden acne eruption to have taken over my face
Bothered about: The lack of time I have to perfect my outfit for the party
Listening to: Lasgo

Today's Likes

Revolution (the bar)
Glittery watery bracelets
People reading my weblog
Queen of Fun in a brownie uniform
My new stupid shoes that have bubble gum prints on them

Today's Dislikes
All my scabs that make me look like a disaster victim
My hair, again, cos of its hugeness
scuffed ankles due to pretty shoes still hurting
Pubes in places they never should be
Tight shirts that cause BO