I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else
1. If your life were a movie, what would the title be?
Life of a Britney Geek: The Lesbo Years
2. What songs would be on the soundtrack?
Britney: Stronger - for those 'dumped' times
Beyonce: Crazy in Love - for those not so 'dumped' times
Flashdance - for teh getting up in the morning scenes
Alcazar: crying at the discoteque - for all those drunken traumas
Mirwais: Naive song - cos I never see what's happening in front of me
Garbage: I think I'm paranoid
Dana International: Diva - The early gay club days
Haddaway: What is love - the lovestruck teenage years spent spinning round lonely pining for The Bitch at the rink
Enrique: escape - shucks
Scooter: that song, for The Bo
Dido: take my hand - for when I skip off into the sunset at the end
3. Would it be a live-action film or animated? Why?
It would be live action because I don't think you could appreciate the full extent of our stupidity in cartoon form. Traumas need live people, not animated figures. All the Dirty Dancing lifts gone wrong, all the piggy back racing, all the tears and all the rest of the shit that goes with us. Trust me, you need live action for that. Oh and also for all the lesbo action. yeah right.
4. Casting: who would play you, members of your family, friends, etc?
well of course I would be Drew Barrymore and I would so be dating Alyson Hannigan (purr, my Lil Red). The Queen of Fun would be played by Samantha Mumba (don't ask) and she would date the real life Jordan (sorry Gyspey Frills Anon...) who would then get dumped for Kate Winslot (there you go Gypsy...). My poofs would be played by beautiful people, perhaps Orlando Bloom, Johnny Depp, Leonardo and maybe David Boraneaz. J Bo would be played by Angelina Jolie and would go gay for the film (hello it's MY life) and do Eliza Dusku while watched by me and Alyson. And Bobby, well I guess I would have you as Nan King. No kitty butlers allowed thank you.
5. Describe the movie preview/trailer.
You'd get a snap shot of a party with us all there, thrity years on. We'd all be smooching and confessing undying love for each other. There would be a bouncy castle that we'd probably all eventually have an orgy on and there would be a tantrum or five, a big bust up and then we'd be back to the smooching. A typical Friday night from 5pm to 6pm. This would be the climax of my life. Sad huh? You'd have to then see how I got there. It would be pretty unpleasant. The hair styles would be vile, the clothing vomitous and my self-set trends monstrously disgusting. You'd close your eyes for most of it, afraid of what hair accessories or how much tye dye you may see. Yeah, this movie would go straight to TV I'm sure. Although, maybe I'd throw in a lesbo sex scene to entice anybody to actually watch it. Not with Jordan though. And she is only hired as a favour to The Queen and because she is cheaper than Bargain Books.
7/25/2003 04:18:00 PM
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