I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else
I am so completely repulsed by the latest 'trendy' hair style which is little more than a modern day mullet. You know the one I'm talking about right? About every third wannabe is cutting around with it, you really must have seen it. If for some reason the return of the mullet has escaped you (maybe you've been bed ridden for weeks?) go to Miss Selfrdige, you should see plenty there. I don't get it. Clearly the bearers of this shag think they are so cool that they can actually pull off a hairdo named after a sweaty fish but how is it possible to make a hairstyle that is so vile cool? It's a hairstyle (using the word style very loosely) that is a form of masochism, a constant source of ridicule that is now back on the heads of total bints. The same bints that thought they made pedal pushers and tapered jeans cool again. You can take the whole retro thing just too far.
It's really two hair styles rolled into one big faux pas. Long and short? Do they charge you double for it? It's just not right. This is 2004. It wasn't cool two decades ago so why would you mutilate yourself in this way today? I wish they would just stop it.
Those who sport the do never call it a mullet of course. They'd never walk into the salon and say hey today I want a mullet, you know like that chick from Gladiators had all those years ago. Did they think no one would notice that they are reinventing possibly the worst hairstyle ever created by one fucked up hairdresser? Are they having a laugh? Or is that just eveyone else sans mullet that is seeing the utter stupidity of this new trend? What the hell was that hairdresser on? Vengence?
I am so glad that this trend has yet to rock the lesbo world who last night, collectively, had hair higher than a tillydrone highrise. Too many of them are in too much of a hair product haze to notice the shite hair trend to have befallen the straight binty chicks. But I pray that history does not repeat itself and the mullet doesn't make a proper lesbo come back to be known once again as lesbian hair (as modelled in the above picture). Even the ceiling height gelled hair is less offensive than a mullet.
So, you modern day mullet owners, the next time you are brushing the long part and teasing the short puffy part just remember that bus driver you always snigger and mutter mullet boy at, rememeber that he is now your hair idol. You will worship his long flowing locks and his short moussed spikes and when he gets abuse for his fishy hairdo you will stand up for his crap hair and display yours proudly beside him. You do infact look just like him.
You will also now need to complete your reject look by ditching your oh-so-fashionable clothes and replacing them with stonewashed tapers, shoulder padded leather jackets complete with tassels and/or a jumpsuit which by the way will never be cool especially if it's are velour and belted at the waist.
So long you trailertrash freaks and may you find yourself on this site one day.
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Lasting 45 minutes in the gay bar... it gets less and less every time...
4/04/2004 12:07:00 PM
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