I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else
Obviously nobody warned us that walking into Eden we’d be stepping back to 1990. Everywhere we turned there were tapered jeans and massive bright white trainers in abundance. I was clearly the oldest girl there by about 2 decades and could only watch on in disbelief at the 10 year old girls attempting a groove in their unfilled bikinis. If the boys were not in their classic tapers then still in their huge trainers they wore ¾ length trousers, badly. It was quite a spectacular sight and I totally felt I was an extra on a Take That video, all ill-fitting clothes and puffy hair.
Speaking of Take That, of course let’s not forget Howard Donald thinking he was well smart posing for photos yet never actually acknowledging the presence of his pubeless admirers. I don’t know what music he was playing exactly but for the entire time we were there we recognised precisely no tunes. It was all a mass of unfamiliar crap and we wondered if he was playing unknown music to make himself look fabulous. Probably. All the neds and the geeks were so twatted that the shite music didn’t phase them. It’s the only time the three of us were all in agreement that we actually wanted some drugs. The only way this would have been bareable would have been if we’d been high on some chemical cocktail I know nothing about.
And don’t even get me started on the lacklustre podium dancers. I’ve never seen such a pathetic effort. They girl near us clearly had new 9” heels on and was familiar in them as she was with dancing. There was absolutely no gyrating, no rhythm and no stamina on these podiums. It was shameful. The teeny tit crew could have done a better job although they would have had no boobies to shoogle.
I don’t know if all the other clubs would have attracted the same ultra youthful clientele but it was so disappointing. All we wanted was a boogie and all we got was a smarmy DJ with too much hair spinning undistinguished tunes to the grateful audience of wasted titless tots. Truly vile.
And so I go attempt to wash this unkempt hair and make myself a bit more presentable for the return of the nurse.
Hallucinating Foucault by Patricia Duncker
My new pink, blue and sparkley tongue stud that almost choked me
Lorraine Kelly, This Morning needs you
Flat pepsi, surprisingly good
Other People’s Blogs
Waiting for Sky installation a week too early :-(
Having been sat around in my pyjamas now for almost a week and smelling accordingly
My staple diet of dry toast and plain crisps
The departure of my nurse to go to work
The stench of ill Fee that’s lingering around the entire house
9/09/2004 01:34:00 PM
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