Diary of a Glitter Splashed Britney Lovin' Lesbo

I am a 25 year old butcheyfemme queer with rubbish on my mind and sparkles everywhere else

Name:Miss Fee


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The Outsider - A Camus

Choke - C Palahnuik


Monday, February 5

Aberdeen has a new gay bar. I went there at the weekend, twice. Yes really; it was THAT good.

I have been gay bar-ing it up in the city now for 11 years and this is without a doubt, the best effort Aberdeen has come up with since then. It’s so big that the dancefloor can accommodate not one but two podiums very comfortably. The toilets are not reeming over with shit and there are no lesbians congregating on the sticky, disease ridden floor. Gone are the days when you had to wait 20 minutes tucked under a gay man’s sweaty armpit as you struggled to get noticed at the bar, which, incidentally, is ginormous. It’s all just far too exciting. Although there is far too much scope to run into people that, unfortunately, you really should not see when drunk.

I haven’t been gay dancing since about November and wondered if my days of twatting it up on the dancefloor were over. Apparently not. We ensured there was adequate room for all of us on the podiums, even if it was a struggle trying to get my bulk up there in a skirt. The music was fantastic, with Sharam’s Party All The Time and Booty Luv being played back to back. Ace.

Friday night saw much much dancing in our flat prior to our booty shaking in the club while Saturday saw us at a Madonna themed party (discoball and everything), nursing our hangovers and endeavouring to stay ‘for only a couple’. Too much fun was had to let it all be over and so we headed gayward, too wasted on rum and red wine punch to remember we were hungover as hell and surviving on about 3 hours sleep.

And so yesterday was physical hell and today is not much better. I can barely cope with a 1-day drinking hangover nevermind bloody two. But hurrah, it’s snowing. Thank heavens for small mercies.

And so I go attach some elastic bands to my trainers so I don’t fall on my ass walking home. I really am too cool for school.